This is what Sri Sri sounds like, when doves, and ISIS, cry

What is the best way to avert the unwanted attention of a person? Well, if you're on Twitter, you use the block button. But if you're ISIS, you send that person the picture of a decapitated body. It's almost like they're saying, "Don't get a head of yourself".

There are some 34 countries involved in the war against ISIS, including military powerhouses like the US and USSR. The US alone spends roughly $11 million a day to fight ISIS. The UN estimates some 250,000 people have already died in the Syrian civil war. Amid all this, a spiritual guru in India feels he can end all the bloodshed with a letter. The pen is mightier and all that jazz.

The ISIS responded to the peace offer by Art of Living founder Sri Sri Ravi Shankar in a typical manner full of grace, humility and threat of deadly violence. Maybe the beheaded body picture meant they didn't want old Sri Sri to make eye contact with a terrorist. Art of Living encountered the art of killing and surprise, it left a bad taste in its mouth.

Appealing to a regressive outfit that rapes and enslaves women and even burns prisoners alive to talk peace is like expecting Prabhudeva to make a film that makes sense.

The guru, after a remarkable epiphany that only enlightened souls like him can achieve, concluded that "the ISIS does not want any peace talks". What gave that away?

"They should be dealt with militarily," he announced. Umm, isn't that what the world is trying to do your eminence? Those F-18 fighter jets in Syrian air space aren't there to transport candy you know.

Who put Sri Sri in charge of this anyway? International diplomacy is not a free-for-all where anyone can jump in. Okay, scratch that. The Americans definitely think it is.

For Sri Sri, the question doing the rounds in the collective mindspace of most Indians can only be put most eloquently in Twitter lingo: "Dude, y you do dis?"

Now don't get me wrong. Sri Sri isn't like other babas. He believes in harmony and they believe in our money. Big difference, that. But I'd still not appoint him as the chief negotiator for peace with the most deadly outfit in the world.

I can hear the voices — Leave him alone. He meant well. What's wrong with a peace initiative? Well, my late grandma meant well too when she saw TV and shook her head with disapproval at the mindless violence. She didn't, however, shoot off a letter to ISIS or al-Qaida saying, "Stop. Stop this violence. And while you're at it, stop the screaming on TV too."

Perhaps, Sri Sri can initiate the hardened ISIS fighters into yoga and meditation. But I wouldn't hold my breath. Not even while doing kapalbhati.

After Sri Sri, perhaps Rakhi Sawant or Poonam Pandey should attempt a peace dialogue with ISIS. #IncredibleIndia

— Ford Prefect (@pre_fect) April 22, 2016

If you take ISIS, reverse it, and add RR in the middle, you get Sri Sri.#DeepThoughtOrMaybeNot

— Ramesh Srivats (@rameshsrivats) April 22, 2016

now i'm just hoping next time sri sri sends isis the location of world cultural festival and they bomb it https://t.co/7MzcaiWm4S

— siddharth (@Punkhaa) April 22, 2016

From Transforming Naxals in Chattisgarh & insurgents in north-east to conflict resolution in Middle east, Sri Sri is truly a Global Messiah

— Ankur Agarwal (@ankuraol) April 22, 2016