Five ways you can beat the Durga Puja blues

(This article is going to be littered with generalisations, because the author believes in this case the generalisations are the norm.)

If you are Bengali, chances are you are currently in depression. If you are not Bengali, you may still be suffering from the all dressed up, nowhere to go syndrome. That's because the year's Durga Puja just got over. Both Bengalis and non-Bengalis, Hindus and non-Hindus flock to the pandals that mushroom all over padas (colonies). We are talking about five days of new clothes a highlight of the sartorial year for many, the time that many teens get their first halter blouse, and boys start alternate between silk kurtas, high top sneakers and high street jeans. We are talking about mouth-watering food, with the vegetarian spartanism of Navratras thrown to the wind-the most vegetarian you may get on a traditional Bengali menu would be a 'deemer debil' or a devilled egg.

We are talking about cultural extravanganzas in colourful tents-music, dance, theatre, remixes, some movie screenings, choirs and sundries, some kid learning to hammer out on a tabla, colony aunties putting up fashion shows, and some unmentionables.

We are talking about raucous packs of youngsters learning how to flirt, and midnight conversations actually sanctioned by parents. It's usually a big affair taking all the residents or vagrants of an area in, and the author believes that this broad base is what has helped Durga Puja become the icon it has, within many, many communities.

Well, the pujas are now over. A deep, dark gloom hangs over many, in the tradition of a boring deaddiction detox. What do we do now, asks one WhatsApp group. For many others, the park which was suddenly the centre of the world is now just a strip of grass with a dog hanging about.

Well, cheer up. Here are five things you can do which will tide you through this time.

1. Clothes. For all those who attend Durga Pujas, the cardinal rule is that you have to wear new clothes. That's eight pairs of clothes, for four days. That's a lot of shopping, and it probably means you first spent hours scouring for cute things online, and then hit your local market for a five-hour long last minute shopping spree. Well, the Diwali sales are still on. No reason why the shopping needs to stop: you can still buy stuff at Puja rates. Because the big baap of the festive season-the end of the year bender with Diwali, Christmas and New Year-is still coming up.

2. Follow up on all the phone numbers you got. Much like Austen's Pride and Prejudice which describes a social universe, with the flirtation all climaxing in balls, the Durga Puja is the highlight of the social calendar for many. But there's no need for all of that to stop. This lull is a good time to follow up on all the numbers you got in the Puja, right before the party season.

3. Sweets! If Durga Puja was about mutton korma, biryani, cutlets, chops, devilled eggs, then this time-right before winter-is about sweets. For many people who have a fat roll too many, winter is the kindest time.

Under a good peacoat, a bulge doesn't show, and under a nice muffler or snood, moobs or a paunch are nicely camouflaged. The nip in the air is just the right time to bite into a Gujia or laddoo, mull some wine, and try out plum cake recipes before Christmas.

4. Throw a party. Durga Puja, more than anything, is a cultural event. No divisions are made on class: Bhog is served to everyone. No differences are made on the basis of religion. Food, fun and festivities bring everyone together, and this event is distinguished by its openness and magnanimity. Really, it's the microcosm of the India we want, not the India certain political groups want it to be. Perfect occasion to throw a party, calling together the most disparate people, people who have never met each other, spark friendships, start an adda on your verandah.

5. Plan a better Puja next year. The Pujas are great, but they produce too much garbage.

Taking a leaf out of the beautiful handloom sarees sported during Puja, think of solutions which are beautiful but indigenous. Instead of plastic and thermocol glasses and plates, think of reusable and washable betel leaf plates. And fewer lightbulbs, so more of the Puja budget can go for a band, rather than electricity.

And before you start on this list of five, take a look at this classification of Bengalis-and make a mental note to self for the next Puja! All criticisms for generalisations and frivolities will be addressed in next year's pandal.