Why it's never too late to fly

If you feel fulfilled at having realised your potential or at least close to maxing all that you have to offer — then turn away. I have no words for you.

Actually I do — go celebrate, live it up, you rare lofty breed. But of course you won’t, because your unwavering focus and drive is what got you there. If you’ve decided to read this piece, then most likely you will see it to its natural end just as you do with everything else in your life.

Focus is one of the many traits I didn’t even notice I had lost till it was so far from my reach that I can vaguely recall its meaning while I’m flipping between Instagram and my kid’s karate class. I numb myself into believing I’m content and peaceful this way. Then, every so often, an innocent new friend will say, “If I had an iota of your energy I’d conquer the world,” or a knowing old friend will say, “If I had your connections, I’d be the queen of the world.”

Well I’m not and at this halfway point in my life, do I bloodlessly accept or do I make a final fight to claim the throne I knew I had it in me to sit on?

I am painfully aware that I didn’t realise my potential. Thankfully, I am also aware that this has little to do with anyone else. I dreamt big, had a personality to match, thrived under pressure and lived for competition. I believed I was too special for wonderful things to not happen to me.

To add to my woes, I even had the education and the opportunities. I could have gone anywhere, done anything.

I lost my way. I chose to follow a frivolous heart one too many times over chasing a career that was mine for the taking. I travelled instead of being trapped by ambition. I refused to be my own advocate, believing the work will work itself out. It will not.

I opted to party, not network. I waited for paths to open up for me when I could have been paving my own way.

Did I have fun? Hell ya! Did I wear the crown I was meant to? No sire! Does it make me happy? I’m not sure.

Here are the things I have learnt and will try my darnedest to drill into my daughter.

Dream, and make it as audacious as you dare because without that there is nowhere to go but here. Sit down and think about everything you need to achieve the dream. Arm yourself with information as your guide. Make a workable plan with short-term practical goals.

Push as hard as you can, with everything you have, towards getting through that plan because without a plan you’re just wandering lost through the woods. With one you are discovering all the delights the forest has to offer.

Have fun, in fact have truck loads of it but never lose focus from what you want. Just keeping your goal in the horizon with a sharp eye on it will repel all bitterness and frustration.

Remember to flow like a river — if one way gets blocked with rocks, trickle through another way. A river has no time to stand there and contemplate the closure - it simply changes course and carries on.

I know this because too often I have stood still and lamented my spot when I could have just changed it by taking a step in another direction.

No one gets to the top by accident, and this hit me like a bolt when Katrina Kaif sat on my couch for the first time. To me, she had been a pretty face who got lucky and I begrudged her her success.

Five minutes into our chat, it dawned on me this girl has worked in an organised, relentless way having the courage to fail and the guts to believe in her dream. Risky and perseverant.

Every single guest I interviewed only proved this further. You know best what you have to do to get there, so pull your finger out and just do it. No one else can or will do it for you.

If you don’t know how — ask for help, openly and unabashedly. But be specific and realistic in that asking. A name for a person you want to be connected to or financial support or a reference.

Everyone is dealing with their own demons, or if they are sitting on top, then, they are fighting a battle everyday and winning. That doesn't mean they won’t or can’t help you but they don't have time to second guess what you need.

A close friend who hasn’t stopped exploding through the stratosphere said it so simply to me, “I ask for favours all the time and people ask me and that’s the way the world works. But I’m too busy trying to put out fires of my own to do someone's else's homework. So if you want something — research, know your facts and ask me explicitly what you want and I will do the best I can to help…because who doesn’t want good karma? Besides you want to be the person who helped somebody get there.”

All this I will tell my child, and, of course she won’t listen. But maybe this time round I will listen and maybe, just maybe, it’s not too late to fly.

(Courtesy of Mail Today.)

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