5 things about being a parent that bring me joy
The kisses, the cuddles, the wide-open SRK-type hugs, real hugs, unconditional love, even when you’re busy, hung over, groggy, lazy. Of course, this is the very obvious joy that all parents say their kids bring them.
These are the perks; but they’re also a given when you have kids. But if I sit down to think about what gives me real joy, it would be something like this:
1) Shaping who these little people grow up to be: When you see them exhibit compassion and sensitivity — not the kind that means they respect the house help to their face but the kind that means they respect the house help even behind their backs — you feel a sense of happiness that comes from deep within your heart.
Because you know you’ve been able to instil a deep-rooted value system that will see them through whatever a life full of flux can throw at them.
2) Learning, discovering, re-living: It may sound a little idealistic but honestly, just sitting down and observing how an ant carries a little morsel to the anthill or staring at the stars at night or poring over an interesting website, encyclopaedia or app together makes the process of learning and discovering so much fun.
You may have learnt it by rote but over the years a sense of observation and life experiences impart several layers to the basic rote learning. And when you’re able to distil that and put it all together in a simple way for your child, and watch her eyes light up, it is a moment of pure joy.
3) Seeing kids develop their own sense of the world: Sometimes, you sit back and wonder how your little one became so wise. When kids travel, meet new people, taste different cuisines, read books, watch interesting programmes, they develop their own world view and before you realise it, you can actually have an interesting conversation, even debate about what they see and sense around them.
It could be about a character from Harry Potter or why countries need elections. They may have a contrarian view, but the joy comes from realising they’re confident enough to have a point of view, articulate it and defend it.
4) Being goofy: Playing board games like Pictionary, putting on music and watching them do the moves they see on screen, or just playing dress up — all of these are the biggest stress busters ever. No Whatsapp forward, YouTube video or text can give you as much spontaneous fun as an uncontrollably laughing baby.
5) Spending "unintrusive" time: It’s probably called quality time for good reason, and in today’s scenario it means time without any gadgets. Whether you bake cupcakes with your son or build a Lego castle with your daughter, whether you play football or go for a run, the simplest things give you the most joy.
Just spending time together with the world shut off reinstates a sense of family, and fills your heart with warmth like no fire can. You feel fulfilled and complete and whole, and all the day’s stresses slowly fade away and cease to matter. And if that isn’t joy, I don’t know what is.