Bigg Boss, big bangs: A ringside commentary on the show for the uninitiated

October 30 was a momentous day for me — due to a concatenation of circumstances, I ended up watching my first full episode of Bigg Boss. And boy, did it have things to watch, and watch out for!

My ignorant self does not know the names of most of the contestants. I don’t follow their work, and hence, am not invested in any of them. Yet, in the short span of 45 minutes, I learnt important lessons about life, showbiz, and found myself rooting passionately for one of the contestants (Somi).

I was also privileged enough to watch the one episode where the stars of the previous season — Shilpa Shinde and Vikas Gupta — made an appearance, and ended up availing a Diwali discount on the show: salient features of two seasons in one episode.

The episode began with ‘Rangeela Re’ playing, and several contestants waking up dancing. People were dressed in boxers to hoodies, so I am not sure what temperatures are maintained in the house.

Soon, however, intrigue started heating up.

Many contestants formed many groups and discussed many controversies and many conspiracies. Friendships were discussed, plans to lure away someone from one group to another — rather like horse trading ahead of elections — were made.

I was gripped, but apparently, the habitual watchers of the show are made of sterner stuff, and have been quite underwhelmed by the current lot of contestants so far.

So, after a Diwali gift distribution that generated much euphoria — and neat product placement, cameras kept zooming in on a particular brand of Schezwan sauce — Bigg Boss made an announcement, greeted with cheers and some jeers: Shilpa Shinde and Vikas Gupta were to be brought in as special guests on the show.

In the midst of all this frenetic activity, there was one persistent gent called Deepak. He seemed to have set his eyes on one Somi, and was wooing her with tactics popularised by Bollywood and emulated in all Indian small towns. “You look so much better without make-up”, he told her as he sat inside a well (yes, there is a well. Don’t ask me why).  “Your eyes are more beautiful than anyone else’s in the house”. Somi, at this point, gave the answer which has won her my support, and maybe, my vote, if I feel motivated enough. “Please stop”, she said. “Or I will jump into this well.” My sentiments exactly.

Soon, Gupta and Shinde arrived.

They were to conduct a complicated game involving the drawing and destroying of rangolis. The reading out of the “destroying” bit evoked, rather alarmingly, very enthusiastic cheers from the contestants.

The game was duly conducted, and saw contestants throw colours in the water, energetically wipe off rangolis drawn in record time, Vikas Gupta throwing his weight around, and Shinde quite literally putting her foot, and the rest of herself, down — at one point, she lay down on the platform the opposing team was supposed to draw the rangoli on.

In a parallel, riveting storyline, poor Jasleen Matharu was quite heartbroken to have learnt that Anoop Jalota Ji had claimed he was never romantically involved with her.

There is love lost here — albeit from only one side.

Gupta also informed Somi she and Deepak were quite popular as a couple outside. This correspondent checked — #BiharKiBhabhi is quite a popular hastag on Twitter. Neither Deepak, nor his fans, care too much about consent.  

The rivalry of Shinde and Gupta had been legendary in the previous season too, and still carries enough star power to light up the current show’s somewhat milder Diwali. Shinde, indeed, has not been out of the news since she appeared on the show last year.

However, the reason for their rivalry — her dramatic exit from Bhabhijee Ghar Par Hain, of whose production team Vikas was a part — is nowhere close to a resolution. Shinde had in fact accused the producer of the show, Sanjay Kohli, of molesting her, and his wife Binaifer Kohli of mentally torturing her. In the pre-MeToo days, Shinde had received little support from the industry.

Even on October 30, Shinde was seen telling Shreesanth that she hates Gupta and wants to punch him.

The spotlight on Gupta and Shinde, thus, is so bright as to render the nuances of their relationship — the very real, very serious charges both have flung at each other — invisible.

Everything is entertainment, as usual.