[Revealed] Demonetisation made Tripura MLA run away with the Speaker's mace

It's a truth universally acknowledged that in India, the well-spring of what-the-hell facts lies inside our hallowed Parliament and the state Assemblies. The scenes inside our legislative houses infinitely outwit, out-funny, out-humour, out-laugh the theatre that goes on outside those precints.

MPs throwing chairs at each other, shouting unparliamentary words, or booing a speechifying member are but a common sight. But nothing could have prepared you for the half-marathon (okay, we are kidding) that one Trinamool legislator undertook in Tripura Assembly yesterday. 

The Tripura Assembly on its last day of Winter session on Monday witnessed a bizarre scene during the house proceedings as TMC legislator Sudip Roy Barman ran away with the Speaker’s mace, stalling legislative business. The incident occurred while the members were debating heatedly about the issue of alleged “womanising” involving ruling CPI-M leaders.

The Watch-and-Ward staff, led by the Marshal, followed Barman and after half a minute, brought the mace back, before Speaker Ramendra Chandra Debnath went back to his chamber.

As visuals from the bizarre incident continue to keep everyone guessing why he did what he did, here's what our super reliable sources told us the reasons behind Barman's desparate dash were.

Firstly, Barman, sources claim they have strong reasons to believe, was running for his spot in a queue outside an ATM that was freshly replenished with Rs 100 notes. The mace, for obvious reasons, he thought would help him in clearing the crowd and to lead others in the queue to make way for him. The marshals, including a very persistent one who kept chasing him, were the other zealous ones with no cash in hand and who wanted to beat Barman at his game.

Secondly, the mace, which is a replica of the Indian national emblem, is learnt to have awakened Barman's fighting spirit to save his party chief and her "republic of West Bengal" from an "impending Army coup". 

Additionally, Barman mistook the Speaker's mace to be Mace, the self-defence spray, about which he got to know only recently from Ivanka Trump's comments. A true believer in women's empowerment, Barman wants to equip all women with enough Mace for self-defence, especially in Trinamool-ruled West Bengal's capital city. Barman came to know about Mace last month after a 2006 quote from Ivanka resurfaced showing her reaction to her father commenting on her appearance. Ivanka had responded to Trump's comment by saying: "If he wasn't my father, I would spray him with Mace".

However, a different source just claimed that a diehard cricket fan Barman was celebrating Kunal Nair's sensational triple century in India's fifth and final Test against England on Monday. Just like we found it difficult to connect the two events, a close Barman aide too dismissed the information. According to him, "Barman was simply desperate for a toilet." 

Okay, you think we are bullshitting? "Just ask those who claim to have caught a glimpse of Barman's soiled pajamas," the close aide told us when we called him up to reconfirm the rumour.

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