Main Amitabh Bachchan bol raha hoon commentary box se
The last time Amitabh Bachchan lent his voice for anything connected with cricket, Bhuvan's team of villagers in Champaner escaped paying "teen guna lagaan". What's more, Lagaan even came within kissing distance of an Oscar.
Yesterday, Big B had a mike within kissing distance as the baritone - that was believe it or not, rejected during an audition by All India Radio in the '60s - turned commentator for the India versus Pakistan World Cup clash. For company, he had the likes of Kapil Dev, Rahul Dravid, Shoaib Akhtar and Aakash Chopra gushing over Indian cinema's most famous voice's cricketing knowledge.
"Aap commentary me aa jayenge to hamari chutti ho jayegi," was Chopra's expert opinion even as Bachchan played his usual humble self. Wish he had said, "Hum jahan khade hote hain, line wahi se shuru hoti hain".
Bachchan's commentary didn't set the Ganga on fire and on most occasions he was only engaging in "Piddly si baatein". But having the legend was a coup for the Star Network as he did something he had never done before. He could have well asked his billion fans across the globe, "Aaj khush to bahut hoge tum. Jo aaj tak commentary box ke seedhiyan nahi chadha, wo aaj tumhare saamne mike pakde baitha hai".
But if Amitabh Bachchan's Hindi commentary had little spice and only had fans drooling over the timbre of his voice, former Indian cricketer VVS Laxman brought a liberal Hyderabadi touch to Hindi. With expressions like "Kya shot maare", Laxman was not a purist's delight but reinforced that diversity in the way Hindi is spoken in different states and cities of India.
The problem with Hindi commentary for cricket is that the game does not have the speed and energy that would do justice to expressions in Hindi. In a game like hockey, commentary in Hindi is still king. The speed and energy with which the voices would reflect the "Gend jo right half ne centre forward ko pass kiya, Argentina ki koshish ball ko trap karne ki, usme veh chooke aur Sandeep Singh tezi se Argentina rakshapankti ko maat dete huwe D me pahunch gaye hai aur unhone yeh shot maara aur yeh GOOOOALLLLLLLLLLL !!"
Cricket in comparison has a thehraav which is not that Hindi-loving. Unless you have a Shikhar Dhawan or a Shahid Afridi on the rampage.
But then, Hindi commentary serves the mitti ki sugandh in contrast to the right language and diction that English commentators dish out. Something that works even better in an India vs Pakistan clash. With Ravi Shastri of the "match down to the wire" fame out of the commentary box, the Hindustani way of serving cricket is a workable option. It is entertaining even when Kapil Dev comes up with predictable and pithy one-liners like "Ab yeh match kamzor dilon ke liye nahi hai" or "Gend ne tippa khaaya aur boundary line ke paar chaar runo ke liye".
In a first, this World Cup, viewers in Tamil Nadu and Kerala get to hear commentary in Tamil and Malayalam respectively on two regional channels. And it is cute to listen to "ball" being referred to as "pand" in Malayalam. Getting in well-known former cricketers or cricket-loving film stars as expert commentators in both languages would also lend glamour value to these two options.
Till then, the Hindi viewer can say, "Mere paas Amitabh Bachchan hai".