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Try loving, not labelling

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Ruchi Kokcha
Ruchi KokchaApr 03, 2016 | 20:42

Try loving, not labelling

Let us play this label game

Oh it is easy and fun to do

You just stick one on me

I’ll find one for you too.

Why are people so keen to put a label to everything and everyone? There is an inherent tendency in people to bring everything into the realm of their own understanding. The tool with which they do it is the language they are most comfortable with. It has nothing to do with the one labelled, but their failure to look through the person. It doesn’t end here. Most of the times, the labels are intended to shame, to remind someone of being an outsider, someone whom you have failed to understand.

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Without knowing anything about someone’s health issue, people would label them as "fat" or "skinny". Body shaming is so conditioned in the collective psyche that people do it without even realising they are doing it. There are countless labels related to the physical attributes or lack of it. If you do not belong to the acceptable paradigm of how a so-called perfect person should look, there is a label ready for you.

Without going into the depths of someone’s ideology, or trying to strike a conversation that would bring out the colours of his political ideas, which of course can never be seen in the shades of black and white, people would brand him as "liberal" or "Sanghi". Who cares for the grey? Grey is always problematic.

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Why are people so keen to put a label to everything and everyone? 

Very little effort is put into understanding the mind and spirit of a person. Even the people closest to your heart would not think twice in telling you that you are "too cold" or "too sensitive" according to their own convenience.

"You feel too much." If you hear it too often then the label designed for you is that of an "emotional empath". An emotional empath is someone who is highly sensitive when it comes to emotions. Empaths feel to the extreme. Although they are natural nurturers and givers, they are mostly misunderstood. When in love, they do not know where to stop and might end up intimidating the recipient with their intensity.

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It is then that feeling too much becomes a curse. Disappointment takes over, followed by insecurity, self pity and emotional angst. One feels unloved, to the point of helplessness. Love feels like an incurable disease that has engulfed the being. No matter what one does, that intensity just doesn’t leave.

What should one do when labelled? The answer is: love yourself. It is important not just to be comfortable with one’s self but to love it no matter what. By loving yourself, you ensure that there will always be one person who will love you and be there for you, even when everyone else has left. Stand for who you are, even it means standing alone.

But the question of "why" keeps haunting. Why is it a curse to feel too much? Why do people have a problem with a certain body type? Why is it impossible to understand views of someone with a different political ideology? Why fingers are pointed at someone who is considered to be an outsider?

Is it the person’s fault if other people fail to understand him/her? If someone is different than you, physically, politically, intellectually or emotionally (and does not pose a threat to the law and order of the state) what right do you have to question the natural state of being of that individual?

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Labelling is easy, loving people for who they are is very difficult. Try loving, not labelling, it would make the world brighter and better.

Last updated: April 04, 2016 | 19:02
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