Why everyone is talking about guardrailing, the viral new dating trend
We know dating is hard, and if you use dating apps, you should know that finding someone with ample green flags is also tricky. But have you ever wondered what are your green flags? When looking out for dating, what are the things that you consider as green flags?
- A new survey by dating app Bumble reveals that 55.5% of GenZ women are practising what is called 'guardrailing'.
What is Guardrailing?
Do you know what guardrails are -- those protective railings by a hill road, for example, that keeps you from falling off a mountain and hurting yourself?
Guardrailing in dating is pretty much the same. These boundaries keep you from going into dangerous zones in your relationship that might leave you hurt later.
Building boundaries are very important for a healthy relationship.
- If you want your relationship to last, any form of boundary that you find important should be communicated with your partner.
- Well, that's what guardrailing essentially is: Maintaining and prioritising establishing boundaries with your partner. This doesn't have to be just physical; it can be emotional too.
Guardrailing is also considered a green flag, and according to a recent survey by the dating app Bumble, 55.5% of women establish it with their partners.
Having boundaries in this modern dating climate has become very important. Not just to protect the health of the relationship, but also to make others aware that they should, too, set some for themselves.
If you're wondering how to actually do that, don't worry -- we got you:
1. Communication is key
Open and honest communication is the foundation of setting and maintaining boundaries. Talk to your partner about your needs, expectations, and any concerns you may have. Encourage them to do the same.
2. Self-awareness
Before you can set boundaries with your partner, you need to understand your own needs and limits. Reflect on what makes you comfortable and uncomfortable in the relationship, this is especially important if you have just started dating.
3. Identify your boundaries
Be clear about your boundaries, both physical and emotional. These boundaries can vary from person to person. For example:
- Physical boundaries may include personal space, touching, or intimacy.
- Emotional boundaries may involve discussing personal feelings, sharing past experiences, or discussing sensitive topics.
Also, remember to respect your partner's boundaries as well. It's a two-way street, and both partners should feel comfortable and safe within the relationship.
4. Set up consequences
A healthy way to make sure that you and your partner are maintaining the boundaries is by establishing consequences for crossing boundaries.
Now, this doesn't have to be too strict, but it's important to follow through with these consequences if your boundaries are not respected. This helps reinforce the importance of respecting each other's boundaries.
And above all, be patient.
Boundaries can take time to establish and maintain. It's normal to encounter challenges along the way. Be patient with yourself and your partner as you work together to create a healthy relationship.
Also remember, as the relationship evolves, so may your boundaries. Make it a habit to discuss and potentially adjust your boundaries with your partner as needed. It's essential to ensure that both partners are still comfortable and happy with the boundaries in place.
Basically, use the guardrails to help you navigate the treacherous terrain that dating is.