#DespiteBeingAWoman: Why Modi was not being sexist

Perhaps irked at Prime Minister Narendra Modi's highly successful tour of Bangladesh, marginalised Congress party spokespersons were quick to brand Modi's appreciative remark about Bangladesh Prime Minister Sheikh Hasina's zero tolerance to terrorism and resolve "to fight terror, despite being a woman" as sexist. And they traced it to Modi's RSS' "bigoted, misogynist" roots and to his marital status which was opaque till recently.

Modi probably never realised that of all the things he said or did in his 40-hour trip to Bangladesh, scoop artists in New Delhi would focus on this remark. But then, Modi never really seems to care what the English speaking "enlightened class" thinks of his speeches, full of homespun wisdom structured to appeal to the average Indian, including many women steeped in local tradition.

Modi's successful equation with this class is because he comes from a background similar to aam janata. It would have never struck this class of people that Modi's remark is sexist or not. Their thoughts are on roti, kapda, makaan - the survival struggle in which gender does not matter. It is because of this social milieu that even Mahatma Gandhi could get away with his condescending advice to women. He asked the woman to "cease to consider herself the object of man's lust. The remedy is more in her hands than man's. She must refuse to adorn herself for men, including her husband, if she will be an equal partner with man. I cannot imagine Sita even wasting a single moment on pleasing Rama by physical charms."

This statement, made in 1921, would now be definitely branded as sexist. It shows the difference between the "form" and "content" that has always permeated our political discourse. Our politicians are happy with "form" rather than "content"; to them netagiri is all about using the right words to appeal to all, regardless of their personal beliefs (though I dare not classify Gandhiji in this class of netas). Otherwise, it is difficult to understand the Congress getting agitated over Modi's remark. When the UPA was in power, no Congress leader had the courage to meet the outraged youth who had brought Delhi to a standstill for three days in protest against the gang rape and murder of a young woman travelling in bus in the heart of Delhi.

So much for the Congress bleeding hearts.

And Congress has its own male chauvinist fringe. All of us remember when Sonia Gandhi introduced 30 per cent reservation for women in party echelons in 2013, a women's delegation asked her to stop exploitation of women by the party leaders. A media report said the women "urged Soniaji to stop this, no matter how big price the party has to pay. The price could indeed be high, as some senior leaders do have a reputation of womanising and formal complaints have been filed against many."

The problem is Twitterati's comments reflect only a section of the society on which our netas are probably not dependent upon for their survival. Modi's #despitebeingawoman remark is commonplace in our political parlance regardless of party affiliations and even accepted by many women because male chauvinism has strong roots in society. That is why we have high court judges advising women to dress modestly to avoid becoming the victim of "eve teasing" - a peculiar Indian English coinage - a sexist semantic cover up of plain and simple harassment of women.

Senior police officers who cannot provide security for women under their watch tell women not to "loiter" on the streets in the night. As usual some politicians from UP outdo all others; they say women cannot be raped without consent. For them rape is always consensual. Period. These so called "netas" not only get away with such remarks but get elected; there is little protest in their constituencies because male chauvinism is firmly rooted in our family, community, and society.

Let us not fool ourselves that women's liberation is here and now.

The whole #despitebeingawoman episode shows the desperation and the inability of the Congress to think out of the box to respond to Prime Minister Modi's continuing success abroad.

Modi's remark about Sheikh Hasina has again raised two age-old issues: competency of women in leadership positions and to lead the nation to fight terrorism. This is surprising because the struggle for gender equity for Indian women started well before independence, when women were cloistered and confined to the home.

Even then we had ordinary women breaking the shackles to strike at male bastions in medicine, politics and business. This was happening all over the world. A good example is Annie Besant, the Irish woman who led the struggle for equal franchise for women, and who came to India to lead the Congress. From then on, women have been clawing their way to the top. In the modern era, from Golda Meir to Margaret Thatcher to Indira Gandhi to Bandaranaikes to Angela Merkel to Dilma Rousseff, women at the helm of their nations have outperformed their male counterparts.

Still #despitebeingawoman continues to be in common usage!

Has Sheikh Hasina really proved her mettle in fighting terrorists? The doughty Bangladesh leader has survived four decades of turbulent politics of the country marked by violence. Her rise to the leadership of the Awami League itself came unexpectedly when her father President Mujibur Rahman and her four siblings were massacred on August 15, 1975, four years after the country became independent.

After her rival Begum Khaleda Zia formed a coalition with the fundamentalist Jamaat-e-Islami to gain power in 1991, Islamic extremism staged a comeback despite its suspect credentials during the freedom struggle. It became entrenched in the body politic of the country. And Sheikh Hasina led the Awami League opposition's struggle against the rise of Islamic extremism and military rule despite a number of violent attacks to disrupt her campaign. It was marked by at least two major assassination attempts in 2004 and a period in exile.

In 2008 she returned from exile to lead her party to a thumping victory in the 2009 elections. Since coming to power she has systematically dismantled the Islamic extremist groups and successfully prosecuted their leaders unrelentingly. She retained power in the 2014 elections and her fight against Islamic extremism continues, though unfortunately it seems to have found refuge in pockets of West Bengal.

As long as Sheikh Hasina is in power, jihadi terrorists who had used the country as a take off point to strike at India will be held at bay.

There is no doubt about it. Pakistan has produced Malala Yusufzai and Bangladesh has Sheikh Hasina - both have earned their spurs in fighting terrorism in their own way.

I am still looking for our own Veer Naari in the frontline of our fits-and-starts fight against terrorism. Where is she?