She was Suzette Jordan, not just Park Street rape victim

Out of the 2,191 contacts on my phone, Suzette Jordan's number was not one I dialled often. The last time I did was when a post on her being barred from entering Ginger went viral on the internet. I wasn't able to get through to her then. The controversy had died down and I guess she felt that she had had her say.

The last time I saw her was when she was entering Someplace Else last year. I was leaving after Parikrama had finished their set. I don't think she recognised me or even wanted to be recognised. But had we talked I would have said I am proud of her. It’s easy to say take back the night. It’s easy to say conquer your fears. But for her, to step out and hit the pubs in the same area, the very same street she was raped, and visit not just at a supposedly safe 9pm, takes some courage. It takes grit. Which Suzette had a plenty.

The time before that when India Today wanted to shoot with her on Park Street (for the "Newsmakers 2013 edition") she wasn't too keen . She had just come out with her identity and wanted to be known as Suzette Jordan and not just an anonymous "Park Street rape victim". "It's too painful," she had said when we approached her. But she did it anyway, and stood amidst weaving traffic, while I held the light and her two daughters stood on the pavement, watching their mother handle a shoot better than most professionals can. Now that's taking back the night, I thought.

She was not so courageous when it came to her daughters, but they had inherited their mother’s plucky genes. "My younger daughter hit a man with her school bag when he tried something with her while she was returning home. I'm scared for them. I asked them not to be so confrontational. But they are stronger than me," she had said with a hint of pride.

She wanted to be strong even in the face of relentless questions that she faced in the courts. She wanted victims to not be ashamed of being raped. “When I heard that the Mumbai journalist came out without hiding her face I wanted to shout. I wanted to cheer," she had said. But maybe she needed someone to root for her too.