BREAKING NEWS INTO PIECES

Coronavirus killed God, but humanity can still defeat it

Doing things you like in this life is sin and doing things you may get in another is a virtue. The virus, however, doesn't care about anything.

 |  BREAKING NEWS INTO PIECES  |  4-minute read |   01-05-2020
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When the coronavirus first arrived on the scene, infecting only a few thousand and killing only in hundreds, they said it's god's way to punish China. Then it spread to other parts, infecting hundreds of thousands and killing thousands, and they said god is punishing humanity. The regressive ones went a step further back, and said women caused it. Women wearing short clothes, used to triggering earthquakes, were blamed for this endemic that became pandemic. Why would the one who loves you punish you? God is supposed be the most merciful, the most forgiving. Well, because you sin. In Abrahamic religions, you have sinned no matter what you don't. So what do you do? You pray the hell out of this sin. In all religions, praying is supposed to heal every ill and illness. And now that all religions have learned from each other, the preachers find sins to blame for everything that goes wrong, from quakes to epidemics.

main_smoking_reuters_050120034631.jpgApparently there is some connection between the layer of tar in the average smoker's lung and the coronavirus's ability to penetrate through it. (Photo: Reuters)

Violence, theft, cheating, etc, are sins. These are horrible things. And immoral to boot. But a lot of pleasure things are sins too. Like the cigarette pack tells you smoking is injurious to your health. The preacher would simply call it a sin. The same goes for drinking. You drink alcohol, you are committing a sin. In India, you eat meat, you are committing a sin. Our Wahhabi bros put music and dance (unless naashid) into that box. In fact, doing things you like in this life is sin, and doing things you may get in another is virtue. The virus, however, doesn't care about anything. So preachers and absolutely-staying-on-the-path people too have got the virus and many have died. People kissing walls they pray to have got the virus, people chanting together in praise of the lord have got it. Children with not many days on earth have died without the opportunity to commit a sin. And so many obviously sinning kind are shining and may they continue to.

Alcohol is haram in Islam. Prohibited in many other faiths. Is sinful in almost all. Alcohol actually saves you from coronavirus. Many whose livers haven't ever been wet with alcohol have been literally bathing in it. The sanitiser doesn't have soap; it's the alcohol that kills the coronavirus. Provided the liquid is at least 60 per cent alcohol. You drink 120 proof plus liquor and any coronavirus in your throat and gut will be gone. Coronavirus does multiply in these two places otherwise.

main_alcohol_reuters_050120034832.jpgAlcohol is prohibited in many faiths and sinful in almost all. But it actually saves you from coronavirus. (Photo: Reuters)

French scientists have begun studying why so few smokers died when so many non-smokers couldn't make it. Apparently there is some connection between the layer of tar in the average smoker's lung and the coronavirus's ability to penetrate through it. Some doctors say the smokers have low immunity, so low that the immune system fails to generate a cytokine storm that kills you. Well, we will have to wait for the conclusion of that study but data suggests if you have been smoking for years, you have a good chance of surviving the coronavirus.

If you are a non-smoker, there is no point starting now. You can't destroy your lungs to the level of destruction that keeps the coronavirus wondering what to destroy here. You will also die early even if the coronavirus fails to get you because lung cancer will at some point. So no, smoking is not a good idea ever. And that's not the point of this story.

The point is these agents of sin, not Jesus, have been saving people. Doctors and medical research long frowned upon by the religious who believe god saves us all are putting their lives at stake, not the high priest. Our sins are exaggerated and virtues are overrated by the priestly class. The governments use this divine disapproval to tax the cojones out of the so-called sins. They are so brazen, they call it a sin tax.

This coronavirus crisis has exposed a lot of dogma and deep-seated delusions about the divine. A lot of us are realising that life is precious uncertain. That the sins and virtues are all made up. It's the good and the bad that one should care about. Life is for living and not worrying about the afterlife or what the books say about life. Books that didn't get right where we came from cannot be right about where we go from here. Stop praying and start helping. Praying is pretending to help, others, or yourself; doing something to help is helping. Like not going out when you don't need to.

Also read: Stop this dog fight and listen to Swamiji. Menstruation starts with men

Writer

Kamlesh Singh Kamlesh Singh @kamleshksingh

Journalism student. Ed honcho at the India Today Group Mediaplex. God's Loyal Opposition. Useful Warning: Tweets may hurt religious sentiments.

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