How watching porn is ruining your sex life
Pornography has long been a staple in the life of a young man. It has evolved over time, from hieroglyphics on a cave wall, to teenagers sneaking peeks of pictures of 1920s' girls showing off their ankles at the beach (those floozies!), to the hidden Playboy mags in that shoe box under their beds, and now it has become easily accessible on the internet. I’m sure half of the male readers right now have another tab open with porn, and that’s the problem.
We are the generation of overindulgence, not intentionally, but because almost every problem from the generations before us has been made simpler. So why wouldn’t we indulge? Porn is the same way. In the past, it was Mission Impossible to get your hairy mitts on a pair of tits. Now, it’s an effortless click away to get whatever your sexuality desires.
But there is a trade-off many, including myself, are discovering the hard way: there are serious side effects to continuous porn consumption.
It rewires your brain
According to a study by Cambridge University, researchers have found that “compulsive porn users react to porn cues in the same way that drug addicts react to drug cues.” How it works is that the brain has something called the reward circuit, which developed during simpler hunter-gatherer times to produce dopamine for naturally rewarding things like sex, food, and bonding.
It misrepresents both genders
Guys, not every girl has huge knockers. Women, not every guy is a packing a foot-long. Guys, not every girl likes their lady parts getting jack-hammered away at. Women, not all guys are pizza delivery boys! But seriously, there are several misconceptions that porn conveys to its viewers. Here is what you must remember about porn: it’s not real. Porn’s main purpose is to entertain, not to show what making love is all about. It is shock entertainment designed to capture the horny consumer’s attention, that’s it! They could care less about how accurate it is to real baby-making, they just want you to watch their video. It’s click-bait to masturbate.
You build up a tolerance
Like anything that elicits pleasure, porn can be addictive. And like any addictive, you can build up a tolerance for it. Heavy porn consumption is an arousal addiction, where you need more or different ways to keep receiving the same high from a dopamine release. In his TED talk, physiology teacher Gary Wilson explains that once you’ve seen the same cookie-cutter positions, your brain wants something different, merely for novelty, shock, and surprise. It starts out with a man and a woman, and next thing you know there are eights dudes wearing masks, one woman, and for some reason, a pelican. Don’t ask.
It dilutes your real sex life
Excessive abuse can not only change your brain, it can change your dick. No joke. That same Cambridge University study found that “over 50% of subjects (average age: 25) had difficulty achieving erections with real partners, yet could achieve erections with porn.” Erectile dysfunction is no longer your grandfather’s problem, it’s yours. Trust me on this one. I have had a couple of awkward nights where I have had to give a bullshit excuse as to why I couldn’t keep on keepin’ on. It’s not you, it’s me!
How can you fix it?
The only way that has been proven to reverse the damage is to go cold turkey. Gobble, gobble. There hasn’t been enough evidence conducted through real scientific studies to back this data yet, but groups like Wilson’s website and Reddit’s No Fap are grassroots examples that provide testimonials of firsthand success. Most of the folks have seen results after 1-2 months including increased sensitivity in their sex organs and a reversal of their erectile dysfunction.
Here is a different way to think about it: When you watch porn, it is you, sitting in a chair, sweaty and naked, typically trying to fornicate with yourself to a glowing screen of images. That is a very lowly state for the human to have evolved into, you are better than that. Use your imagination or get out of the house and find someone who will do whatever your sexuality desires with you. An old fashioned may be old-fashioned, but it’s better than screwing yourself.
This article has been reproduced from Mitchell Virzi's blog.