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#TheDailyToast: The bitter truth of Karva Chauth

Gayatri Jayaraman
Gayatri JayaramanOct 30, 2015 | 10:45

#TheDailyToast: The bitter truth of Karva Chauth

They won't be searching for the moon in China. Necessity is the mother of invention and there will be much invention in China tonight, as the Amul-billboard quipping adman Rahul daCunha put it now that the state has lifted the ban on the number of children a Chinese couple may have. This results from what has been dubbed a "shortage", prompting a professor to suggest that Chinese women take to polyandry, choosing multiple husbands. Though, as any progressive, rational, patriarchal society would put it, lest you assume this is some regressive leaning towards a matrilineal system, oh no, this from the men's point of view, is "share your wives". Which completely ties in with the Beijing court which ruled that women who head out at night, smoke or drink, "ask for rape", a statement which elicited many clicks of empathy from as far away as Egypt. Much as the MNS leader Raj Thackeray explained Modi's rise as the singular outcome of Rahul Gandhi being in the opposition... so also, feminists are united and women empowered by men being equally sexist everywhere.

Lest the sleight-of-hand disappearance of the Shanghai sheath of pollution confuse you, it's not like regressive attitudes towards women can be wished away by building an Olympic village. To be clear, China is not furthering the cause of women because women need the upliftment, empowerment or visibility within the population, but because men don't have enough to go around. Which defines, in national policy, the objectification of women as commodities.

Which is the exact opposite of what is currently taking place in the former USSR, according to research. In erstwhile Russia, there are fewer men than women. In fact, according to Pew Research, Martinique has the fewest men per women (84.5 per 100) and the UAE has the most men per women ratio - 274 per 100 women.

India, despite all the hysterics we come up with from time to time, or more likely because of them, seems more evenly balanced than most. So when women in India pray for the longevity of their husbands today, what they're really saying is: How will you find the kitchen and find a pair of matching pair of socks in the laundry without me? And you can't even imagine the mess this room would be in. There is no consensus however, on why women need to starve to say this. Neither among men who, pained to see their wives starve, have taken to counting the longevity of men in states that do not starve and point to the fact that the statistics don't add up, nor among women. The consensus is that women do it because it allows them extra beauty treatments which is just what woman power needs to further the cause of the male gaze. You know, prettied up women for men to delight in, and when you run out, just make more. Which brings the world and its patriarchy full circle.

What is the purpose of Karva Chauth? The bitter truth? Pre-parties, guilt-tripping men into gift giving, and if you are so inclined, getting rid of the pesky partner. (Though my favourite un-Karva Chauth related modus operandum remains this one.

Knowing the wiles of women, it is amazing that men have not asked: Who is the con on, really? Well the CIBIL just nudged men to assign an independent credit rating for financially-dependent spouses. Karva Chauth also increasing accounts for 13 per cent of consumer spending during festivals. The stomach may be fasting, but the bank account is munching away.

Women have the tenacity to guilt trip an entire economy into submission. Get the hint from China already. If it doesn't boost the male economy, it's probably not about the welfare of women. We weren't born yesterday. Just hand us your wallets. Chew on that while we're fasting.

Last updated: October 30, 2015 | 12:56
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