Why the world is not yet prepared for Rakhi Sawant’s wedding
This match is made somewhere between heaven and Los Angeles.
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We Indians love to move in a batch — from our school final examinations, graduation parties to weddings and kids — we identify each other as belonging to the same batch.
So, it’s no wonder that most of our social compulsions are prodded by this 'herd mentality' — no wonder a number of Bollywood weddings are taking place at the same time (Deepika, Priyanka, Kapil Sharma).
But, Rakhi Sawant?
We know that Rakhi Sawant is the content we want, but don’t deserve!
We don't deserve them! (Photo: Instagram)
As we don’t get to decide what we deserve, Rakhi Sawant put out a ‘strange’ e-invitation card on Instagram, announcing that she would be tying the knot with Deepak Kalal on December 31.
There are a few details about this wedding that you won’t want to miss.
“Two loving heart (sic) are getting united and making a promise to be in love forever” — is how the proposed wedding has been described.
The location is also very specific — LA (Los Angeles) — unless there is a Mumbai hotel by the same name.
The world is a lie. (Photo: Instagram)
Moving on, 46-year-old Deepak Kalal is a social media star, famous for his exactly ‘Rakhi Sawant-like’ brazen content — but Rakhi-like fame might have eluded him as he confined his talent mostly to social media. According to some reports, Deepak refused to be part of Bigg Boss 12. We know the precise reason why you might not have heard Deepak Kalal’s name before.
This is, of course, not the first time Rakhi is supposed to get married. In 2009, she chose NRI businessman Elesh Parujanwala on her television swayamvar. But instead of getting married, the duo got engaged, only to break up a few months later.
On the other hand, Deepak Kalal had introduced Tarunnam Khan, another YouTuber of questionable videos with millions of views, as his 'wife' in a number of videos.
There are apparently more questionable aspects to the wedding.
Deepak Kalal presented two 'medical certificates' claiming that the happy couple were both virgins.
Our eyes are bleeding. (Photo: Instagram)
This brought us to the obvious conclusion that everything is a lie — apart from social media followers and Instagram ‘likes’.
But then, Rakhi Sawant confirmed the news of her wedding and said, “Yes, it’s true we are getting married. Everyone in the industry is tying the knot and I felt it was the right time for me to get married too.”
We knew this.
But what we didn’t know was that Karan Johar and SRK have already confirmed that they would be there at her wedding, apparently.
So, the joke — which is on us — will continue for some time now.
But we wish the couple all the happiness, especially after Rakhi apprehended that she would never find a match after what Tanushree Dutta had done to her.
This match has been made somewhere between heaven and Los Angeles.
Again, Rakhi Sawant is what we want, but don’t actually deserve.