4 lessons from famous Hollywood break-ups

This year has been a bad one for A-list love. Seemingly rock-solid celebrity marriages, including those of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner, Mandy Moore and Ryan Adams and Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale have crumbled.

Also read: 6 things you should never say to your partner

Although the glitz and glamour of celebrity life might seem a million miles away for most of us, matters of the heart and the trials and tribulations of marriage are universal. So what can these celebrity break-ups teach us — and how can we use their experiences to make our own relationships stronger?

1. Right to privacy

We all have a right to privacy about our past.

Getting married doesn’t mean giving over the keys to your history and all of your internet passwords, but there is some dirty laundry that you shouldn’t keep festering in the closet.

Not telling your partner about children from a previous marriage, or how you experimented with relationships when you were younger – these things may come back to haunt you.

Gavin Rossdale and Gwen Stefani's marriage hit a rough patch when it emerged that he was the father of Daisy Lowe. The pair's union survived that revelation but they went on to file for divorce citing irreconcilable differences in August after 20 years together.

Your partner can only be accepting of your past if you are open about it.

Honesty is the basis of trust, and hiding important things in your life will pave the way to an uncertain future and create an emotional barrier between you and your partner.

2. Partners can stray

One of the major themes of celeb break-ups this year has been suspected infidelity.

Jennifer Garner, Danielle Lloyd, Gwen Stefani all faced rumours that their husbands were being unfaithful.

In our line of work, we know that infidelity is common — more common than we think — but we also know that it is almost always a symptom of something else that is wrong with a relationship. Being cheated on doesn’t have to mean that your relationship ends, but so much rests on how things are handled.

Also read: Celeb break-ups are a joke

Imagine if you discovered that your husband had been unfaithful, but you heard it from someone else, or worse — you saw photos of him with another woman on the internet or on the family shared photo feed (watch out for that!)

It’s always better to hear things straight from the horse’s mouth, no matter how much it hurts. Honesty is sometimes the only way through the breakdown.

3. Losing faith

The suspicion of infidelity can be as catastrophic as the actual act. Crucially, we don’t know whether Ben Affleck or Gavin Rossdale were unfaithful – but we do know that suspicion, mistrust and jealousy can destroy a relationship, without anyone even needing to stray.

If you’re worried that your husband is cheating, both you and he have some work to do.

You have to establish how much your fears are grounded in reality, and how much it’s your own insecurity projecting on to him.

Your husband has to take responsibility too; he knows what your pressure points are and clearly something in his behaviour isn’t filling you with confidence.

Also read: Sonam Kapoor thinks break-ups are liberating, do you?

Spending more time together and talking about fears without making accusations is really important when doubts set in.

4. Need for balance

In today’s world, women can have it all – a glittering career and a loving husband and family. But nothing in life comes easy, and we have to make sure that we get the balance right between work and family.

Many ambitious A-listers focus on their career to the detriment of their relationship or months of being parted while working on different projects can take their toll. There are men who just can’t handle being with a successful or powerful woman, but most can work with it if you play it right.

Also read: What George Clooney can teach Imran Khan about marriage

There are different strengths in every partnership – you have to show you value the ones he has and help him to value them too.

None of us can be superwoman, but we can learn to balance our careers and our families and have strong, supportive relationships with the men we love.

(Courtesy of Daily Mail.)